When this creature enters, target opponent reveals a number of cards from their hand equal to the number of creatures in your party. You choose one of those cards. That player discards that card. (Your party consists of up to one each of Cleric, Rogue, Warrior, and Wizard.)
Lifelink
When this creature enters, return target creature card with mana value 2 or less from your graveyard to the battlefield. That creature can't attack or block for as long as you control this creature.
When The Meathook Massacre enters, each creature gets -X/-X until end of turn.
Whenever a creature you control dies, each opponent loses 1 life.
Whenever a creature an opponent controls dies, you gain 1 life.
As an additional cost to cast this spell, sacrifice an artifact or creature.
Draw two cards and create a Treasure token. (It's an artifact with "{T}, Sacrifice this token: Add one mana of any color.")
Cleave {2}{B} (You may cast this spell for its cleave cost. If you do, remove the words in square brackets.)
Target player reveals their hand. You choose a nonland card from it [with mana value 2 or less]. That player discards that card.
Flash
As long as The Wandering Emperor entered this turn, you may activate her loyalty abilities any time you could cast an instant.
+1: Put a +1/+1 counter on up to one target creature. It gains first strike until end of turn.
−1: Create a 2/2 white Samurai creature token with vigilance.
−2: Exile target tapped creature. You gain 2 life.
Whenever a creature you control dies, put a loyalty counter on Lolth.
0: You draw a card and you lose 1 life.
−3: Create two 2/1 black Spider creature tokens with menace and reach.
−8: You get an emblem with "Whenever an opponent is dealt combat damage by one or more creatures you control, if that player lost less than 8 life this turn, they lose life equal to the difference."
If you control two or more other lands, this land enters tapped.
{T}: Add {W}.
{4}{W}: This land becomes a 3/4 white Dragon creature with flying until end of turn. It's still a land.
{T}: Add {W}.
Channel — {2}{W}, Discard this card: It deals 4 damage to target attacking or blocking creature. This ability costs {1} less to activate for each legendary creature you control.
If you control two or more other lands, this land enters tapped.
{T}: Add {B}.
{3}{B}: Until end of turn, this land becomes a 3/3 black Beholder creature with menace and "Whenever this creature attacks, exile target card from defending player's graveyard." It's still a land.
{T}: Add {B}.
Channel — {3}{B}, Discard this card: Mill three cards, then return a creature or planeswalker card from your graveyard to your hand. This ability costs {1} less to activate for each legendary creature you control.
Cleave {4}{W}{B} (You may cast this spell for its cleave cost. If you do, remove the words in square brackets.)
Destroy all creatures [with mana value 2 or less].
Flying
When this creature enters, you may reveal a card you own named Legion Angel from outside the game and put it into your hand.
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